“Unuseless” Invention #177:
Auto Pussy Petter™
No time to pet the cat? Here’s a let-it-get-its-own-pet set.
Ever noticed that when a cat craves affection, it’ll rub up against basically anything—your leg, the table, the wall–until you finally provide that pat on the head it craves? Well, we noticed. And then we began to look for a way to harness that energy (because, after all, how much fun can being pet by a wall be?)  The Auto Pussy Petter™ exploits one of nature’s own furry perpetual motion machines. By walking under the cushioned prosthetic hand, now Toodles can pat her own head and scratch her own back. Best of all, use of the Pussy Petter™ needn’t be taught–cats instinctively get the idea. One drawback: this gadget is best kept indoors, lest your pets figure out they don’t really need you.