The Ten Chindogu Tenets

Every Chindogu is an almost useless object, but not every almost
useless object is a Chindogu. In order to transcend the realms of the
merely almost useless, and join the ranks of the really almost useless,
certain vital criteria must be met. It is these criteria, a set of ten
vital tenets, that define the gentle art and philosophy of Chindogu. Here
they are:

1. A Chindogu cannot be for real use

It is fundamental to the spirit of Chindogu that inventions
claiming Chindogu status must be, from a practical point of view, (almost)
completely useless. If you invent something which turns out to be so handy
that you use it all the time, then you have failed to make a Chindogu. Try
the Patent Office.

2. A Chindogu must exist

You're not allowed to use a Chindogu, but it must be made. You
have to be able to hold it in your hand and think 'I can actually imagine
someone using this. Almost.' In order to be useless, it must first be.

3. Inherent in every Chindogu is the spirit of anarchy

Chindogu are man-made objects that have broken free from the
chains of usefulness. They represent freedom of thought and action: the
freedom to challenge the suffocating historical dominance of conservative
utility; the freedom to be (almost) useless.

4. Chindogu are tools for everyday life

Chindogu are a form of nonverbal communication understandable to
everyone, everywhere. Specialised or technical inventions, like a
threehandled sprocket loosener for drainpipes centred between two
under-the-sink cabinet doors (the uselessness of which will only be
appreciated by plumbers), do not count.

5. Chindogu are not for sale

Chindogu are not tradable commodities. If you accept money for one
you surrender your purity. They must not even be sold as a joke.

6. Humour must not be the sole reason for creating a Chindogu

The creation of Chindogu is fundamentally a problem-solving
activity. Humour is simply the by-product of finding an elaborate or
unconventional solution to a problem that may not have been that pressing
to begin with.

7. Chindogu is not propaganda

Chindogu are innocent. They are made to be used, even though they
cannot be used. They should not be created as a perverse or ironic comment
on the sorry state of mankind.

8. Chindogu are never taboo

The International Chindogu Society has established certain
standards of social decency. Cheap sexual innuendo, humour of a vulgar
nature, and sick or cruel jokes that debase the sanctity of living things
are not allowed.

9. Chindogu cannot be patented

Chindogu are offerings to the rest of the world - they are not
therefore ideas to be copyrighted, patented, collected and owned. As they
say in Spain, mi Chindogu es tu Chindogu.

10. Chindogu are without prejudice

Chindogu must never favour one race or religion over another.
Young and old, male and female, rich and poor - all should have a free and
equal chance to enjoy each and every Chindogu.